Thinking about it, Han Jaeheon’s request wasn’t all that rude. Asking for help because he couldn’t keep up with class was, in a way, something any student had every right to say — arguably even an attitude to encourage… The problem was that his motives seemed off.
But Eunseo couldn’t think deeply about those motives. To think, he had to picture Han Jaeheon, and once he did, there was no room left to ponder motives. First came the sweet scent that had tickled his nose, the pheromones mingled with cool cologne that had strangely heated his body, the dreamlike, perfectly symmetrical face filling his vision, the soft voice laced with kindness, and those big hands that had wrapped around his wrist—
—because every sense but taste was plastered to him, what exactly was he supposed to be refusing?
Sitting there blankly, having thought that far, Eunseo shot up so hard his wheeled chair slammed into the wall behind him. Then he bolted for the restroom. His face felt like it would burst into flames.
Only after splashing cold water on his face for a while did he calm down even slightly. Meanwhile, his phone buzzed several times inside his lab coat. Barely confirming in the mirror that his color had returned, Eunseo shook the water off his hands and took out his phone. Several messages from an unsaved number.
「Hello, TA. This is Han Jaeheon. Something came up today — would it be okay if I come by 5:30?」
Should I tell him not to come? I’m busy, tell him not to come. People started coming in and out of the restroom, giving him odd looks. Staring down at his phone screen, Eunseo slowly tapped out a reply.
「Yes, understood.」
***
“Sorry I’m late.”
Han Jaeheon walked into the seminar room with his usual fresh face, apologizing lightly as he sat down. Next to Eunseo again, not across.
“…You don’t have your book today either?”
“Ah, yes. Sorry. It’s too heavy.”
With a body like that, shouldn’t he be carrying a book like this easily? Or is he embarrassed to be taking a freshman class? As the cologne that suited him so well wafted over, Eunseo edged his chair sideways, muttering inwardly.
“I’ll definitely bring it next time.”
Laying the apology on thick, Han Jaeheon lowered his brows. Eunseo, robbed of words by that face yet again, could only bob his head a few times. With anyone else he could’ve at least managed ‘Please do bring it next time’ or ‘I don’t think this is very polite’….
“I felt bad you missed dinner because of me last time, so I bought some food.”
“Ah, yes….”
Couldn’t he have come thirty minutes earlier in the time it took to buy this? — but watching him brightly take out sandwiches and coffee, Eunseo’s words jammed again.
“I said I’d buy you dinner, but the timing seemed awkward.”
“……..”
“Okay to eat while we work?”
“In the seminar room….”
“Ah, is food not allowed? But it’s Friday evening, looks like no one’s around.”
That was true too. No matter how hard the STEM researchers worked, most cleared out between four and five on Friday evenings at least. Even workaholic Jin Seunghu had already left, and Eunseo had turned off all the lab lights himself — the chemistry labs might as well have been empty.
“It’s sandwiches and coffee, so it won’t smell much.”
“Yes, let’s eat. You must be hungry too, Han Jaeheon-ssi.”
“Han Jaeheon-ssi….”
The title sounded awkward to him; Han Jaeheon repeated ‘Han Jaeheon-ssi’ a few times. Then, smiling softly, he unwrapped a sandwich and handed it to Eunseo.
“You still haven’t dropped the formalities.”
“This is more comfortable.”
It was still much better than at first. He was using haeyo-style more than the blunt dana-kka style now. Eunseo bit into the sandwich — mashed egg, ham, cheese — and chewed busily. Then he glanced at Han Jaeheon. He was a notoriously slow eater, so whenever he ate with someone new he always had to match their pace like this.
He was a notoriously slow eater, so whenever he ate with someone new he always had to match their pace like this. Whether he noticed or it was just habit, Han Jaeheon took a coffee out of his carrier and said,
“Eat comfortably.”
“……..”
“There’s coffee too. I got Americanos, is that okay?”
It was lucky it was an Americano, since he never ate anything sweet. Eunseo nodded and pulled over the plastic cup beaded with condensation.
“…It’s good.”
“Right? There’s nowhere to eat on campus, so I went off campus to buy it.”
He went off campus to buy sandwiches? Around the school there were only mountains; buying anything meant budgeting an hour round trip by transit. He could’ve just come earlier with that time — thinking it again, Eunseo just kept biting off soft pieces of sandwich and swallowing.
“TA, you said this course has two exams, right?”
“…Yes.”
Eunseo chewed and swallowed what was in his mouth before answering, and Han Jaeheon made a pointlessly solemn face. He had no idea what the motive was behind asking something plainly written on the syllabus, but he clearly hated exams.
“Are the exams on weekends?”
“No, luckily… during class time.”
“That’s a relief.”
Eunseo ate diligently. Because teaching Han Jaeheon genuinely took stamina. Even tutoring the neighborhood middle schooler famous for being dense hadn’t been this exhausting. That kid had seemed sincerely unable to understand, and that had been pitiable. But Han Jaeheon….
“What’s wrong?”
“…Nothing.”
Honestly, it was obvious he was doing it on purpose. Eunseo slowly replayed Han Jaeheon’s attitude so far. His attendance alone was bad. Only a month into the semester and he’d already missed twice — already at the edge of failure.
And he didn’t turn in problem sets properly, didn’t turn in lab reports properly…. He was clearly someone just trying to complete the course and graduate — so what was this situation? Eunseo, who’d chewed until the food in his mouth turned to water, already knew the answer. That Han Jaeheon was doing this because he wanted to torment him.
“…Is he feeding me just to torment me more?”
“TA?”
“Ye—… yes?”
“Wondering what you’re thinking about so hard alone.”
“……..”
“I’ll just step out to the restroom.”
Eunseo’s eyes blankly followed Han Jaeheon as he winked and stood. Was that kind of thing ingrained in him? Eunseo let out a baffled empty laugh at the ill-fitting politeness. Then he started hurriedly eating the sandwich he was only halfway through. He couldn’t eat well in front of people, so this was his chance.
Popping the last piece of bread in his mouth and chewing, Eunseo opened the thick book. This week’s student experiment was less an experiment than learning to handle various chromatography instruments, so the reports didn’t need much effort. A simple Abstract, how to use the instruments, and in the Summary a note on where it could be applied — that was enough. He didn’t even need the book.
“TA, have some apple too.”
“…Yes, thank you.”
After finishing even the neatly cut apples in their container, over an hour had already flown by.
“I’m sorry — I asked for just an hour or two.”
“No… it’s because we ate dinner. So today….”
“The lab report.”
“This week’s experiment was super simple.”
“It wasn’t simple.”
“As a chem-eng student, it’s just handling a machine I’ve used hundreds of times, once more?”
“Putting it into words is another matter.”
He talked a blue streak. Watching Han Jaeheon volley back his words so smoothly, Eunseo held out his hand for at least what he’d written so far. But Han Jaeheon just beamed. Empty-handed again.
“At least… shouldn’t you show that you’re trying?”
“That’s why I keep coming here.”
“……..”
“Ah, come to think of it, my classmates asked if you’re giving me private tutoring.”
“Tutoring?”
“Yeah, they say college-student tutoring is big these days. Like math tutoring for business and econ students?”
It was hardly different from tutoring. Especially last time — he’d practically re-lectured the whole week’s content, and unlike the inconsiderate professor, he’d repeated explanations over and over, checking whether Jaeheon understood.
“Should I pay you a tutoring fee?”
“No.”
“Ah, are you okay?”
“This isn’t tutoring… it’s after-class studying.”
“……..”
For the first time, Han Jaeheon was at a loss for words. Feeling oddly thrilled by that, Eunseo smiled in front of him for the first time. Forcing down the grin spreading on its own, he continued in the calmest tone he could manage.
“So should I start with the Abstract?”
“You only need the Summary.”
Probably wondering why he’d said that, Han Jaeheon shrugged and took his laptop out of his bag. The open Word file was, fortunately, written up to just before the Summary.
“You didn’t copy this from an old report, right?”
“As if.”
“……..”
“I did reference one.”
“Honest of you.”
Han Jaeheon’s laptop had a privacy filter on it, so it wasn’t visible properly from the side. At first wondering if his eyes were just blurry, Eunseo squinted — then realized, and without thinking scooted a little closer to Han Jaeheon’s side.
“In the Summary, you write where and how this instrument can be used.”
“Hmm… the report I got didn’t write it like that.”
“Then it probably didn’t get a good grade….?”
The owner of the report Han Jaeheon had copied was Choi Sanghun from chemical engineering, and unfortunately his report grades mostly hovered at B and C — he’d never gotten an A. Unable to reveal another student’s grades outright, Eunseo phrased it roundaboutly, and Han Jaeheon’s face cooled slightly.
“Ahaha… really? I got it as a Word file, so I didn’t know.”
Hmm, I see. Didn’t know. At the voice trailing off like he was talking to himself, Eunseo felt his hair stand on end. He tried to steer the mood back, hoping Han Jaeheon would focus on his report again, but he already seemed deep in other thoughts.
Shouldn’t have said that. He’d only meant to explain how to get a good grade. Someone who’d copied it without reading once — typos included — was never going to care about the report’s quality anyway.
Eunseo drank his melted iced water and waited; a few minutes later Han Jaeheon found his usual pace again. And with that handsome face brightly smiling, he pressed his shoulder against Eunseo’s. Startled by the hot body heat, Eunseo shifted slightly sideways, turned his head, and exhaled. Above his left chest ached.
“Okay… picture it in your head. There’s a staircase — what do you do to climb it?”
“Move your feet.”
“No — are you really chem-eng?”
“Yes, I am.”
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